Have not written in a long time — the workload went from 0 to 100 really quickly sometime in mid-September. One week I’m able to play League for hours and make it to 4th floor Lyons as well without worrying about quizzes or homework; the next week I don’t care that it’s 2:30 AM and I’m still up. RIP sleep, hi to enough sleep debt for high blood pressure.
That aside, I can’t believe it’s already almost November…it was around this time last year that I went to Meet the Parents and in a turn of events that I couldn’t have predicted, had a freshman year that I still very, very sorely miss. Nostalgia is a double-edged sword — it feels so good, but then you feel really sentimental afterwards *degree of sentimentality may vary per person*. Sophomore year so far hasn’t felt much different or exciting, and as a result, I still honestly feel like I’m a freshman. At this rate I’ll enter junior year feeling like a freshman too.
Maybe it’s just the classes I’m taking, maybe it’s because I’m not good at managing time, and maybe it’s just because I’m making excuses for not trying as hard in school as I should be (or maybe all three)…but I feel significantly more overwhelmed this year than last year. I’ve always been the type to run away from stress, but after doing that last year [aka playing league and staying up on Youtube], I don’t want to repeat the less than great grades I got in some of my classes. I’ve been trying to find little happinesses (happynesses? what’s the plural?) around campus. Often times we may find it hard to look outside our deadlines and papers and events, but it feels great to take a small break once in a while. BC has a very beautiful campus. We’re lucky to be able to go to college, even if the practical benefits of it (aka finding a job after graduating) are decreasing every passing year. We have a nice bed to sleep on, unless you have those creakier ones. We have good friends to talk to and confide in, as social inept as some of us may be. I personally know I am — sometimes I talk too much to one person, other times I don’t respond, other times I stare off blankly into space, the appropriate words unable to come out of my mouth.
It feels good to write every once in a while. Now to stop procrastinating and get back to the 5 assignments I have due on the same day.